These days I’m dealing with a lack of motivation because I don’t know where I’m going and which outcome I’m getting.
Sometimes I force myself to write things only to continue the streak, but I’m encountering difficulties that are hard to push through.
I feel like I don’t have a mission.
Just journaling doesn’t reward me enough, but I don’t have a clear vision of what I should talk about.
I may be too pretentious with myself lately. I would like to craft excellent articles quickly, well written, with a specific goal, and thinking little-to-nothing about it. I run high expectations when I have defined nothing.
Writing these posts helps me reflect out loud what is currently going on in my mind, even if sometimes in negative degrees.
Last week I started going through the Simple Habits course by Matt D’Avella’s Slow Growth Academy, and I’m introspecting a lot thanks to the exercises at the end of each lesson.
At first, I told myself I would’ve built a writing habit, but then I understood that my issue is about making and publishing things.
Yes, what I would like to do is building my projects! Writing is only a step of a more giant ladder.
In the past, I always found myself stuck just after starting something as if it does not matter to me. I know this is not about my knowledge, but it depends on some perfectionism block at a deeper procrastination level.
This drives me nuts.
As Anne-Laure Le Cunff said, our heart, head, and hands should be aligned. If I would like to feel great again, there is something between the head and the soul that I should fix. Or maybe I don’t have the right skills to go through this monster alone.
To conclude, I’ll go forward until the 30th day, then I’ll try to understand whether to pivot or continue writing these posts.
I barely understand why everything is so Instagram-centric nowadays. And I don’t say this because I’m “old” but rather because I don’t know how most people post photos of themselves or their activities with such consistency.
I try to spend my time living life, so if there is the opportunity to catch a photo or a video, then it’s fantastic, but I do mostly from my perspective. I’ve never bothered someone to take a picture of me, and no one shot it by chance neither. Yet I go out a lot, perhaps even more than my friends’ average.
It is probably a matter of priorities.
I still may be the old way too. I’m used to asking the mobile number instead of the Instagram profile. I don’t start chatting from there, nor I stalk between people’s stories. I keep old photos instead of archiving them because they are still part of my life, even after a relationship is over. And I also have been judged about this, “c’mon, it’s 2020, bro.”
Really should I care more about the first-impression or, worse, cancel my past only to look cool?
I feel out of the competition.
Followers number or how many likes we received doesn’t matter at the end of the day, at least for people who do not use social for business purposes like me.
Digital is my world. I have platforms knowledge, so the problem doesn’t sit here. It is I don’t care; they don’t have much importance in my life right now.
I want to understand why I feel stupid to confront me with those who publish photos of themselves rather than of a landscape—my problems.
I don’t judge. I ask myself questions that I cannot answer yet.
Sometimes I evaluate whether to delete my social profiles, but in the end, I know I’ll never do it, and I will go on my way based on how I feel the road under my feet.
Time is the measurement unit of our lives. Everything revolves around those 60 seconds, multiplied endlessly.
Without time, we will not be able to arrange a meeting with someone. Imagine waiting for your friend indefinitely because he didn’t know when he should have come.
We postpone things later based on time:
“Yeah, I know I should get fit, but I’ll start the diet on Monday!”
“That project? Yes, I’ll check it tomorrow.”
But we also feel guilty if we spend our time doing nothing rather than chase our goals.
I don’t have time.
We hear this regularly. Being busy has become a competitive sport where time is the most used excuse.
Let’s say you encounter your friend John cry. You figure you don’t have time to listen to what happens, because you should go. So you tell him that you’ll meet in the next days, but then you’ll never call back. The problem is you didn’t care.
Time may appear slow, or it can go fast.
Einstein determined that time is relative, and the rate at which time passes depends on your frame of reference.
When we are children, there’s a lot of time ahead; when we grow up, we think there is still; one day is over, and we realize it’s too late.
I never said “I love you” to my parents.
I have to make the most of this opportunity as long as I have the chance.
The other day I saw Netflix’s brand new documentary The Social Dilemma. It explores the impact of data mining on social media and how it affects our lives.
People interviewed like Tristan Harris – former Design Ethicist at Google and now president of the Center for Human Technology – raise awareness about the dangerous effects of the practices used by big technology companies.
The movie tells something I already know, but I felt like I was punched in the gut anyway.
More money, please
“If you don’t pay for the product – you are the product.”
Social media business models stand on advertising money. The advertisers can target people to such a granular level that wasn’t possible before with traditional advertising. And to maximize nothing but profits, we are subjected to only the most engaging and relevant content.
But in doing so, everyone lives inside a filter bubble, isolated from diverse perspectives, strengthening our cognitive and social biases.
It influences people.
For example, disinformation campaigners can easily manipulate and tailor messages to people who are already inclined to believe them.
We are no longer able to get bored; we fill the slightest feeling of boredom with infinite feed scrolls.
We struggle to look at the horizon in silence without taking out the phone. We have the world just a click away, so we no longer live the world around us.
We take smartphones to the bedroom, and we make love with them. Social media inject us dopamine to such an extent that we have developed an addiction.
We lost the ability to interact with other people.
There is a scene where Ben sees Rebecca, his crush, but doesn’t go to talk to her. He gives up and extracts the phone from his pocket. Being lost scrolling the feed is safer; it doesn’t involve emotions, and we feel relaxed.
We are slowly turning passive. It’s easier and requires no effort.
Fear of missing out
It’s been years since I think smartphones are our new TVs.
People watch TV less and less. I do, for one, only sporadically for a movie or sports events that interest me.
But if most of us recognize and avoid the TVs’ wrong stimulus, we let social networks and smartphones keep sucking our time.
We have developed the FOMO, a form of social anxiety about missing things online. We check social media even more often, not to miss anything.
Apps like Mailbrew help us disconnect from feeds with daily email digests and embrace the joy of missing out (JOMO). Attempting this path is a conscious decision, but what about everyone else?
Netflix created a docudrama to warn about the big technology companies’ harmful practices while following the same patterns within their app. They push us to binge-watch films or tv shows through custom covers crafted on our preferences and data. And they strive for our time suggesting related videos we may like, even at the end of this movie!
Filmmakers painted a horror scenario showing us only a perspective, and I’ll take it. But tech itself is not the problem.
We have adopted a new pattern of thinking that changed our habits.
There will always be whiteflies, but they will gradually become isolate cases just like 20 years ago when the weirdos connected online were us (today we estimate 4,57 billion people with internet access).
It looks like this new global humanity doesn’t have a real way back.
But we can be aware of it. We can set boundaries, decide when to start or stop, turn off notifications or uninstall apps.
It’s time to switch from being consumers to creators.
Be you to choose the outcome. Excesses are never good.